Monday, December 11, 2006
Starting with eyebrows, instead of looking like two bows, the beautician messed up & made it a straight line. (Not exactly, but I dint liked the shape she gave). Thanks to my sunglasses.
Next, waxing. Instead of heating wax, beautician irritated me with cold wax. She took 1 hour to wax legs & hands. I swear not to try new beautician next time.
In second beauty parlour, she had given good facial but goofed up with money.
Third beauty clinic, it is one famous hair dressing parlour; it is a designer hairdressing clinic. Here the mistake is unpardonable. Hair dresser shortened my hair, which I nurtured for a year in order to straighten & color.
While sitting in front of my dressing table, & analyzing the errors by beauticians, I was thinking if there were some Astro speak (astrology ) column for beauty treatment in News Paper.
ARIESMar21-Apr20Try not to get eyebrows, waxing by new parlour, it may go wrong as you would be wasting your time & energy. Keep your eyes gazing into the best parlour so that in future, it will surely come in handy to you. Be very careful while paying your bill in parlour else you may be duped. It is not a favorable time for hair designing. Else your celebrations mood will be interrupted this chain reaction of your mental state will reflect on your work. Refuse to be inhibited by negative situations or comments, maintaining this dynamic mood.
Lucky days for beauty treatments: 12th, 14th and 17
Friday, November 24, 2006
Jeseem has tagged me sometime back. I was tied up with my spiritual trip to Tirupati
1. Climbing on the tree with friends & playing pranks (making horrific sound at passer by)
2. My school vacation which I religiously spent in my grand mom's home.
(It was a meeting point for all my 16 cousins)
3. Grand mom's special pyaar, cheating grand mom.
(Eat my share of mangoes, pick one worm from ground place on mangoes skin & show her "Look what you have given me". )
4. My sweetheart bakery man who was an ideal husband material at the age of 6. hehehe. He possessed a Pastry shop yummy. I was planning to marry him so that I can eat all pastries, cake without asking mom to buy.
5. Getting wet in rain, building castle on sand, catching butterfly & getting scolding from mom
6. My hostel life. Miss all my friends, their stories, showing off new stuffs. Miss solving senior’s mathematics & showing off that I am a genius.
7. My Tie which displayed badges (Rank, most of the times High score mathematic, Kannada, Social studies, Moral science)
8. Counting vehicles (Bus, bike, Car, scooter), running, jumping, cycling
1. When parents drop me to hostel after vacation. That separation was heart breaking
2. When people squeezed my cheeks
3. Running on a ground at midday in Physical training period
4. When mom called me her nose & two of my brothers her eyes.
5. When seniors stole school badge & got punishment for incomplete uniform
6. Eve teasing when I was kid.
7. Mom’s extra cautious lecture, particularly to me because I am a girl
8. Mess food, especially upma.
Ye Daulat Bhi Le Lo, Ye Shohrat Bhi Le Lo
Bhale Cheen Lo Mujhse Meri Jawaani
Magar Mujhko Lauta Do Bachchpan Ka Saawan
Wo Kaagaz Ki Kasthi Wo Baarish Ka Paani
Mohalle Ki Sabse Nishaani Purani
Wo Budhiya Jise Bachche Kehte The Naani
Wo Naani Kee Baaton Mein Pariyon Ka Dera
Wo Chehre Ke Jhuriyon Mein Sadiyon Ka Phera
Bhulaaye Nahin Bhool Saqta Hai Koi
Wo Choti See Raaten Wo Lambi Kahaani
Kadi Dhoop Mein Apne Ghar Se Nikalna
Wo Chidiya Wo Bulbul Wo Thithli Pakadna
Wo Gudiya Ki Shaadi Pe Ladna Jhagadna
Wo Jhoolon Se Girna, Wo Gir Ke Sambhalna
Wo Pithal Ke Challon Ke Pyaare Se Tho'fe
Wo Tuti Hui Chudiyon Ki Nishaani
Kabhi Re't Ke Oonche Tilon Pe Jaana
Gharonde Banana, Banaake Mitaana
Wo Maasoom Chaahat Ki Tasveer Apni
Wo Khwabon Khilono Ki Taabir Jaageer Apni
Na Duniya Ka Gham Tha Na Rishton Ke Bandhan
Badi Khoobsoorat Thi Wo Zindgaani
Sunday, November 19, 2006
A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation andcommunications equipment.Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position.
The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled,and held up a handwritten sign that said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters.
People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew alarge sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER."
The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely.
After they were on theground, the copilot asked the pilot how he had done it."I knew it had to be the Microsoft Building, because they gave me a technically correct but completely useless answer."
Thursday, November 02, 2006
I just cant understand why Ramu is hell bent upon remaking sholay.Its not just me, whole world is wondering why? Why ? Why?
The worst part to digest was Nisha Kotari playing basanti & ghoda is replaced by autorickshaw. Now Basanti is ghungroo & her dhannu is laila.
Ramu's Gabbar Bachchan looks like an one hundred eighty year old sick man who has already booked his ticket to heaven.
sholay's dialogue will be something like thing
gabbar:- "Kitne Din bache hamra is duniya me"
samba:- "Sardar baghawan jaane"
gabbar:- "Arre oh samba, ghungrooo ke laila me jakar hamara liye dho waqt ki khansi ke dava lekar aa, ..."
Samba:- "Sardar devi* ka hospital se lekar aavu kya?"
gabbar:- "arre woh kutte, kamine jaldi lekar aa"
Radha is Devi played by Sush & she is a nurse, something more than lightning & putting off the lantern hehehehe
Song for the moment:-- Arre Ramujee, abh Zidd chodo mano meri baat
Warna aur ek flop hoga tumare saath.
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
Har Roz agar Diwali hote....
kaam office me null hota...
Khaane ko milte laddoo,
Aur duniya kehti...Happy Diwali to you!
Tomorrow is Traditional day. I am in total mood. Again tomorrow is Samir's treat. So we are going to freak out again. I am sure that we are going to miss Samir. He is one happy go lucky kinda guy. Some how now I am used to this type of environment. People come, people go, again new people come, so life continues. :). At the end it is just you.
song for the moment :- Jeene ke hain chaar din, baaqi hain bekaar din
Hey jeene ke hain chaar din, baaqi hain bekaar din
Jaaye jaaye, jaaye jaayeEk baar jo jaaye,
jawaani phir na aayeHey hey, jawaani phir na aaye
Monday, October 16, 2006
lots of celebrations going on in office for Diwali. We have color days. And I am over enthusiastic to participate. Today was Salman Khan's day. Shhhhhh dress code is not a shirtless but it was Black.
I wore a black western suit. I got many wows, Many dashing, striking, rocking compliments. let me see whether I will win a prize for Best dressed female.
Tomorrow is Govinda day. I have finished modelling . I am going to wear shocking pink trouser (My friend exclusively got for me from Dubai hehehe) & a Flouroscent Green T, want to wear Red blazzer as I dont have Yellow one in my ward robe :(.
Day after tomorrow (wednesday) is Jumping Jack Jeetu's day. No prize for guessing the color. Ya u got it its "White". I will wear white chick Kurta , churidar courtasy my tailor if he makes ready the suit. Else hunt for some other white's in my ward rob.
Finally on thursday Traditional day. I will wear Saree ;). Blood Red embroidary saree, accessories gold jewellary.
I wish everyday we have a color days so that I dont have to stand in front of ward robe for 15 min's & think which dress to wear hehehehe.
During my color Days week, I would like to sincerly thank my maid for her patience folding all the costumes which is unfolded & thrown during my modelling trials at home hehehehe
I will post pics in my coming post.
Song for the moment :-- Rang barse beege chunariwali rang barse.
Friday, October 13, 2006
As Hirdu says ye BnB baaz nahin aayegi. I myself have to say that to me hehehe
I was reading Memoirs of Geisha, I got so addicted I travelled in train whole week to catch up with reading process. One day I could not just stop it reading, I was hiding the book inbetween the PC & my bag & was reading with one eye. One of my colleague was so enquisitive to know what I am upto he messaged me "I know you are at some mischief ". I gave a blank smile.
I could not concentrate on my work. I went to rest room locked myself in loo & started reading the book. 30 mins I was inside the loo(Thanks to room freshner :)). The rest room attender was wondering what has happened to me. Thank god I came out. Else they would have broken the door.
moral to me:- Next time while I hook up with novel in loo , just to inform rest room attendent that I have major constipation problem:)
hum-ming:- Bedi chalayi leh jigar se piya Jigar maabadi aag hai
Thursday, September 28, 2006
Yeh mumbai ka traffic hai,kabhi rasthe me kadda milta hai tho kabhi kadde mein rastha. Tension kayko leta hai.
There are few people in world like to experiment with life, & most are happy with things. Tension kayko lene ka. ha ha.
But Change is something unavoidable in life.Nothing is Fixed or it works as expected.
take for example this blogworld. I had few blogmates,I loved reading thier creations. But after sometime, most of them said adieu to blogging.So it is time to hunt again.
moral to me :)Accept the change & move on with life.
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
It is believed that Goddess Durga on her 10 day journey around the earth removes all evil....... May Goddess Durga destroy all evil around you and fill your life with happiness and prosperity. May this Navratri… Bring You Joy and Happiness... To last through out the year!
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Have you come across Lexi pen advt. in FM radio's. Its real funny. It may be mindless, but I simply loved it.
If u haven't heard it goes something like this
Male: Swapnasundari wearing maxi
Getting out of yellow Taxi(Repeat)
Gets into the club
Pagal ho gaye sab
But surprisingly she chooses me
And she says, she says
Female: Is that a pen in your pocket mister? (Repeat)
Or are you? Or are you?
Just happy to see me?
Or are you just happy to see me?
Male: I said, "Swanpasundari, wearing maxi..
I am very very sorry sexy
But now every pocket has a Lexi
Now every pocket has a Lexi"
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Its since ages I have rubbished it. Lemmi do the honour of rubbishing. ha ha ha.
Prospective husband: Do you have a book called 'Man, The Master ofWomen'?
Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.
There is only one perfect child in the world and every mother has it.
There is only one perfect wife in the world and every neighbour has it
The world's thinnest book has only one word written in it: Everything
and the book is titled: "What Woman Want!"
A man who surrenders when he's WRONG, is HONEST.
A man who surrenders when he's NOT SURE, is WISE.
A man who surrenders when he's RIGHT, is a HUSBAND
Q: Why dogs don't marry?
A: Because they are already leading a dog's life!
Ek aadmi apni biwi ka antim sanskar karke ghar ja raha tha. Achanakbijli chamki, badal garje, jor se barish start ho gayi. Dukhi aadmi: Lagta hai pahunch gayi.
Fact of life: One woman brings you into this world crying & the other ensures you continue to do so for the rest of your life!
Q: Why doesn't law permit a man to marry a second woman? A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same offence
Life is a paradox-what u want u don't get(luv), what u get, u don't enjoy(marriage), what u enjoy is not permanent(girlfriend), what is permanent is boring(wife)
Lady 2 her maid: Oh Kanta, I hv reason to suspect that my husband is having an affair with his secretary." Kanta : I don't believe it! U r just saying that 2 make me jealous!"
Man: I want a divorce. My wife hasn't spoken to me in six months. Lawyer: Better think it over. Wives like that are hard to get!
Doctor 2 husband: Tuhadi biwi te tuhada blood group same hai. Husband: Hovega kyon ni, 25-saal to mera khoon jo pee rahi hai!
The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother & said, "I've founda man just like father!" Mother replied, "So what do u want from me, sympathy?"
After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a foolwhen I married you." She replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love & didn't notice."
Q: What is difference between watch & wife:? A: Ek kharaab hoti hai to band ho jaati hai aur doosri kharab hoti haito chaloo ho jaati hai.
Different Phases of a man:
After engagement: Superman
After Marriage: Gentleman
After 10 years: Watchman
After 20 years: Doberman
Thursday, July 27, 2006
By gods grace I am alive to write this post.
We have heard & seen numerous incident on TV about Terrorism. We might have shed plenty of tears to unknown soul.But But when u visualise or have been Victim of such terrorism, than it is totally a different story.
11th July 2006
At 6.21 p.m boarded borivili Fast at Dadar staion. Train was just leaving mahim station,at that moment the power in train was switched off followed by loud explosion & smoke. The train shook for some secs. At that moment I realised it is a bomb blast. But other commuters in train came up with other conclusion. HT wire got short circuit , the train is on fire. Let us jump from moving train. I was in first class ladies compartment which was adjacent to gents firstclass compartment which was bombed.
I dint wanted to take some stupid dicision.I never wanted to jump from running train. Few moments it was tough to decide. Other co passenger started jumping from running train. The train came to halt within minutes.
Other Men came running to help us. Two men held my hand & helped to get down. Outside scene was horrible, blood soaked men, injured men, dead bodies. Oh my god, what a pain. I dint know how to react. I was crying inconsolably. Everyone were crying. Some one asked me is there someone I know in that compartment. I said no. They tried to console me. I was crying for my co passengers, thier family. I was crying for pathetic environment we are leaving in. I was crying for insecure environment created for us.
Life had drained lots from me at that moment. Could not stand there for another min in that situation, I walked to roads to catch some other alternative to my destination. Cab drivers refused to come to Borivili. My colleagues were rushing to come to pick me up. I refused, i din't wanted them to take risk. I took BEST bus from Mahim depot.Bus started getting overcrowded. atleast 200 people were standing in bus. It took 4.5 hrs to reach home. People on roads were very helpful. They were serving biscuits & water for all the commuters on road. I was not in need of that. My mind was calculating other facts.
2 of my colleagues are seriously injured. One of my brothers friends cousin died in blast.He was married just 3 months back.
Why innocent people should be victim of this terrorism? When will this terror end? When will we roam without fear in free India? On occasion of Independence day these question crop up in my mind.
Monday, July 10, 2006
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
Sunday, June 25, 2006
A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, 'Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?' The first man approached him and said, 'Sir, I don't wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?' The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied, 'My wife's first husband.'
Sunday, June 11, 2006
Wow Zoonie, I am so happy for u. Congrats boi.
I dint post for sometime now. Guys just imazine two of ur cousin aged 9 & 13 standing (or sitting which ever position they feel comfortable) behind you & reading aloud every word u type, can any one proceed to crack ur junk thoughts. hehehe atleast I couldn't.
when I was kid we used to play Satgolpi(dont ask me the meaning lol).for eg. Some one call out saying look at Jyothsna. If anyone turns around to see Jyothsna, and if it was a frank, that person say Satgolpi. Then a big task start there. The one who was the victim of frank should touch 7 standing person. We used to follow so religiously that task. It still bring my child hood memory back. This TAG remembered my Satgolpi task :).Thank you Ekta. Here it goes.
I am thinking about....Chocolate doughnut, black forest pastry, nachos, ice cream all yummy yummy stuff
I said....Did I say that I had a bad crush on bakary guy when I was five for those lovely pastries(I will post this sometime later;))
I want strength...to run on thread mill to burn all the calories I accumulated just thinking about all high calorie food.
I wish for.... a magic plate which convert all high colorie food into low cal. Hey scientist of this universe are u listening?
I miss.... my childhood, my school days, my hostel life, my crushes
I hear.... my mom screaming at me right now for taking shower.(I always celebrate my lazyness day on week end)
I wonder....why god created me with empty brain hehehe
I regret....nothing.Whatever happened in life had a reason.(Always my glass is half full)
I am ...Still trying to find out.
I dance.... when I am happy & also in Party.
I sing....when I want to shew away anyone from my vicinity.(If there is an award for bad singer, its my birth right to recieve it)
I cry.....When some one hurt me.
I am .... very stubborn
I make with my hands.... Everthing. Without hand It is impossible to make anything.
I write.... what I feel.
I confuse.... to understand people
I need....love & Warmth always. Also loads of chocolate daughnut, icecream
I should ....be an active blogger cos it makes me happy especially because I can blabber all my junk thoughts with out reviewing
I start.... things with lots of enthusiasm
I finish...If the started enthusiasm hasn't died its natural death.
Sunday, May 28, 2006
Manmohan Singh to Bush - We are sending Indians to the moon next year.
Bush - Wow! How Many?
Manmohan Singh - 100. And we have a policy for it also.
25 - OBC
25 - SC
20 - ST
5 - Handicapped
5 - Sports Persons
5 - Terrorist Affected
5 - Kashmiri Migrants
9 - Politicians and if possible 1 - Astronnaut
The interview by CNN-IBN Karan Tapar , on reservation With HRD Minister Arjun Singh its a good long read, but well worth it! If you have missed it, here it is.
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
The most amusing thing in the world is Indian wedding. The grooms & brides family invite the people for the wedding in order to share thier pleasure & seek the blessing for newly wed.Instead people have 100 intension other than these two.
Aunties ( I mean elderly ladies)attend the wedding to exibit thier jewellary, heavy designer saree. Guys attend wedding for bird watching. Oh my gawd, some guys literally have thier jaws hanging.Some girls attend the marraige for mom's pressure. Some Mom attend for hunting wud-be-Son in law.
Once I happen to attend the wedding for the same reason some years back.
Me:- Oh my god mom, ask me to jump from 10th floor, please leave me alone.
My mom:-Mr.XYZ son has come from U.S.I want to talk to Mr.XYZ about the proposal.
Me:- I dont want to be Gungi gudiya. I wont come
My mom:- If you dont listen to me, then I dont let you go for ur higher studies.
Me(in mind):- Mom I have 100 distructive ways for spoiling this.
My adamant mom took me to wedding. I went with her cribbing,grumbling.The torture was not just attending the wedding. I was made to wear Fancy dress.I mean a saree & lots of Jewelary. Mom am I a mobile Jewellary store. Mom looked at me with her sharp eyes.
I was sitting in midst of aunties coz it was mom's order.They were more interested in my marraige than the current marraige.They were discussing of my marraige. Mom said them to find some one suitable to me.
Mom was eagerly waiting for Mr.XYZ to arrive. He arrived with his family. Mom was about ask about Mr.XYZ son, he stood in front of my mom with his American wife. "Hi aunty hows u doing,meet Jenny"
I was holding hanky to my mouth & burst out laughing.
Part II to be continued
Thursday, May 18, 2006
Hey whatz happening in blogworld. I was bit busy these days. Reason I was undergoing TORTURE I mean training. Learnt some beautiful stuff. I missed my blog chooo muchhhhhh. Also I missed u mates. I know some of u all also missed me. haha there were some request to post atleast a forward. But there was absolutely no time to do that too.
Any way I dedicate this beautiful song which is my favorite & very close to my heart to all
abhee naa jaao chhodakar, ke dil abhee bharaa nahee
abhee abhee to aayee ho, bahaar ban ke chhaayee ho
hawaa jaraa mahak to le, najar jaraa bahak to le
ye shaam dhal to le jaraa, ye dil sanbhal to le jaraa
mai thodee der jee to loo, nashe ke ghoont pee to loo
abhee to kuchh kahaa nahee, abhee to kuchh sunaa naheen ..
Thursday, May 11, 2006
1: I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position.
2: I'm not really out of the office. I'm just ignoring you.
3: You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out ofthe office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.
4: Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brain removed so that I may be promoted to management
5: I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me until I return from vacation on 5/18. Please be patient and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.
6: Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.
7: The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending again.'
8: Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system.You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply inapproximately 19 weeks.
9: Please reply to this e-mail so I will know that you got thismessage. I am on holiday. Your e-mail has been deleted.
10: Hi. I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait by your PC for my response.
11: Hi! I'm busy negotiating the salary for my new job. Don't bother to leave me any messages.
12: I've run away to join a different circus.
Sunday, May 07, 2006
How Many Women
After three years of marriage, Kim was still questioning her husband about his lurid Past.
"C'mon, tell me," she asked for the thousandth time, "how many women have you slept with?" "Baby," he protested, "if I told you, you'd throw a fit".
Kim promised she wouldn't get angry, and convinced her hubby to tell her. "Okay," he said, "One, two, three, four, five, six, seven - then there's you - nine, ten, 11, 12, 13.."
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Friday, April 28, 2006
If your Mangal is strong, they back u out saying u bring bad luck on husband's Career.
If Your dad has not generated so much wealth, they back you out Coz u cannot pay the admission Fees(Dowry)
If You don’t have a Job they back you out Coz u cannot pay your maintenance fees.
If you are bit darker complexion they back you out Coz u may produce Darker off springs.
If you are Vegetarian they back you out coz you are not Non Vegetarian.
If you are a day older than a prospective guy, they back you out, coz it is not our custom to marry elder female.
If you are rich they back u out, coz u may be proud & not be an ideal bahu.
Some from Invincible
If u are taller than ur beau, then again its against our custom.
If u are earning more than ur beau, again u may have vanity and treat him disrespectfully.
If u are from higher 'cast' then u wd always undermine him
If u r from lower cast, then u r no match for the boy's esteemed family.
Oh my god there are so many factors to consider, match & mismatch to get married in India. Again still you guys ask me "Why am I not married"
It is not my story, it is every other unmarried gal's Woe. I was inspired to write this after bachchan's rejected Ash coz she is Manglik. In country like us every gal has to under go the Guy's Family tantraum no matter what u are? who u are?
Note:- So Guys & Gals, You are welcome to add your point to the list.
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
After Amitabh's best dialogue, just a thought on generation next legend's best dialogue.
Song Running in mah mind:--- na koi padhne wala na koi sikhne wala
apni toh paathshala masti ki paathshala
Monday, April 24, 2006
I know such English that I will leave the British behind. You see sir, I can talk English, I can walk English, I can laugh English, I can run English, because English is such a funny language. Bhairo becomes Byron because their minds are very narrow. In the year 1929 when India was playing Australia at the Melbourne stadium Vijay Hazare and Vijay Merchant were at the crease. Vijay Merchant told Vijay Hazare. look Vijay Hazare Sir , this is a very prestigious match and we must consider it very prestigiously. We must take this into consideration, the consideration that this is an important match and ultimately this consideration must end in a run. In the year 1979 when Pakistan was playing against India at the Wankhede stadium Wasim Raja and Wasim Bari were at the crease and they took the same consideration. Wasim Raja told Wasim Bari, look Wasim Bari, we must consider this consideration and considering that this is an important match we must put this consideration into action and ultimately score a run. And both of them considered the consideration and ran and both of them got out.
Main aur meri tanahaaii, aksar ye baaten karate hain
tum hotin to kaisaa hotaa, tum ye kahatii, tum vo kahatii
tum is baat pe hairaan hotii, tum us baat pe kitanii hasatii
tum hoti to aisA hotaa, tum hoti to vaisaa hotaa
main aur meri tanahaaii, aksar ye baaten karate hai
majabuur ye haalaat, idhar bhI hain udhar bhii
tanahaaii ke ye raat, idhar bhI hai udhar bhii
kahane ko bahut kuchh hai, magar kisase kahen ham
kab tak yuunhii khaamosh rahen, aur sahen ham
dil kahataa hai duniyA kii har ik rasm uThA de
dIvaar jo ham dono me hai, aaj giraa de
kyon dil me sulagate rahen, logon ko bataa de
haan hamako muhabbat hai, mohabbat hai, mohabbat hai
"Yeh tumhare baap ka ghar nahin, police station hai! Is liye sidhi tarah khade raho!"
Rishte me to hum tumhare baap lagte hain , naam hai Shahenshah."
"Haan, main sign karoonga, lekin pehle us aadmi ka sign le ke aao, jisne mera baap ko chor kaha tha ; pehle us aadmi ka sign le ke aao jisne meri maa ko gali deke naukri se nikal diya tha; pehle us aadmi ka sign le ke aao jisne mere haath pe ye ('mera baap chor hai') leekh diya tha. Uske baad... Uske baad, mere bhai, tu jo kahega us par main sign karoonga."
Sholay "Tumhara naam kya hai, Basanti?"
My all time favourite
Mausi : Arre beta, bas itna samaz lo ke ghar me jawaan beti seene par pathhar ke sil ki tarah hoti hai. Basanti ka byaah ho jaaye to chain ki saans loo.
Jay : haa sach kaha mausi aapne. bada bojh hai aap par.
Mausi : Lekin beta, is bojh ko koi kunwe me to phaik nahi deta.Bura nahi maananaa , itanaa to poochhanaa hi padataa hai ke ladke kaa khaandaan kyaa hai uske lachhchhan kaise hai, kamaataa kitnaa hai?
Jay : Kamaane ka to ye hai mausi,..,ke ek baar biwi bachhon ki jimmedaari sar pe aa gayi to .. kamaane bhi lagegaa.
Mausi : To kya abhi kuchh bhi nahi kamaataa?
Jay : Nahi nahi ye maine kba kahaa mausi, kamaataa hai lekin,... ab roj roj to admi jeet nahi sakataa na. .. kabhi haar bhi jaataa hai bechaaraa?
Mausi : haar jaata hai?Jay : haan mausi ab ye kambakht juwaa cheej hi aisi hai ab mai kyaa kahoon ?
Mausi : heynnnn. to kya juwaari hai?
Jay : chhi chhi chhi chhi mausi, woh aur juwaari na na. woh to bahot hi achchha aur nek ladka hai.Lekin mausi, ek baar sharaab pi li na phir, achchhe bure ka kahaa hosh rahataa hai. Haath pakad ke bitha liyaa kisi ne juwaa khelane. ab isme bechare Veeru ka kya dosh?
Mausi : Thik kahate ho beta. juwaari woh sharaabi woh lekin, uska koi dosh nahi.
Jay : Mausi aap to mere dost ko galat samaz rahi hai. woh to itanaa seedha aur bhola hai. aare basanti se uski shaadi karke to dekhiye, ye juwe aur sharaab ki aadat to do din me chhoot jaayegi.
Mausi : Arre beta, mujh budhiyaa ko samaza rahe ho. ye sharaab aur juwe ki aadat kisi ki chhooti hai aaj tak.
Jay : Mausi aap Veeru ko nahi jaanati , wishwaas kijiye wo is tarah kaa insaan nahi hai. Ek baar shaadi ho gayi to woh us gaane-waali ke ghar jaanaa band kar degaa. bas, sharaab apne aap chhoot jaayegi.
Mausi : Hi hi, bas yehi ek kami raha gayi thi. to kya kisi gaane-waali ke ghar bhi aanaa jaanaa hai?
Jay : To isme kaunsi buri baat hai mausi. arre , gaana soonane to raajaa-mahaaraajaa unche unche khaandaan ke log jaate hai, haan.
Mausi : Achchha ! to beta ye bhi bataate jaao ki tumhare yeh gunwaan dostkis khaandaan ke hai?
Jay : Bas mausi, khaandaan ka pataa chalate hi ham aap ko khabar de denge.
Mausi : Ek baat ki daad doongi beta. bhale sau buraaEyaa hai tumhare dost me ,phir bhi tumhare munh se us ke liye taareefe hi nikalti hai.
Jay : ab Kya karoo mausi.. mera to dil hi kuchh aisa hai.(pause)...To.. mai ye rishtaa pakkaa samazoo?
Mausi : Pakkaa? . bhale saari jindagi ladaki kuwaari baithi rahe. lekin mai aise aadami se Basanti ko nahi byaahanewaali. Sagi mausi hoon. koi sautelee maa nahi.
Jay : Ajeeb baat hai. mere itane samazaane par bhi aap ne inkaar kar diyaa.. Bechaaraa Veeru... naa jaane kya karega
Friday, April 21, 2006
lolz, Hi guys happy week end. Enjoy this one
Why Parents Get Gray Hair !
The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered, "Hello?"
"Is your Daddy home?" he asked.
"Yes," whispered the small voice.
"May I talk with him?"
To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No."
Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?"
"Yes," came the answer.
"May I talk with her?"
Again, the small voice whispered, "No."
Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked the child, "Is anybody else there?"
"Yes" whispered the child, "a policeman."
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked "May I speak with the policeman?"
"No, he's busy," whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?" asked the boss.
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the firemen," came the whispered answer.
Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, "What is that noise?"
"A hello-copper" answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there?" asked the boss, now alarmed.
In an awed whispering voice, the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper."
Alarmed, concerned, and more than just a little frustrated, the boss asked, "What are they searching for?"
Still whispering, the young voice replied, along with a muffled giggle
Monday, April 17, 2006
Now I am all excited to count who is Indian Idol II, even though it is not getting anywhere close to X Factor, American Idol or Indian Idol I.Count down begins. Will it be Karunya or It is Sandeep?
My Favorites in second season were NC Karunya, Ammey Date, Panna Gill.
I just cannot forget Panna gill's Jalak Dikalaja Number. He set stage on fire. Marvelous.
Other was Ammey Date Who can forget ‘Laga chunari mein daag chupaaoon Kaise’. Sadly both are out in prior Episodes.
NC Karunya, Great singer. Look a like of Abhishek Bachchan. He is thee Best Among the Finalist. He just mesmerize with his Voice.
Other Finalist Sandeep, he is Bekener's Udit Narayan, who just sing in udit Style, has regional backing of voting.
I just hope & Wish Karunya Win the Show. But cant predict even though he is good, This Voting system has become real head ache. Voting should be like some percentage should be counted from home town, other part of Voting should be from all parts of India.
Anyways Karunya is Thee Best. To be more Diplomatic let the best Man Win lol he he he
Friday, April 14, 2006
My dad said "If this mob, had gone to fight Veerappan 3 years back to forest, it had made sense, Now what are they trying to Prove creating so much fiasco"
I innocently said "Even I dont know, what is thier point?"
But there arise some thoughts, When are we Growing Up? When will we be matured to analyses whatz right? whatz wrong? Whatz Needed? Whatz not?
Thursday, April 13, 2006
Kill animal & go to Jail, Kill human in public & walk out free. Kill animal & hang out mercilessly in butcher shop.U get licence for this.
If Salman was guilty for killing chinkaara, How about killing thousand's of Sheep in the name of mutton & consuming it.
Dont sheep have life? Who is to decide life of sheep is less worth than Chinkaara? Both are god's creation. Just a thought for soul
Saturday, April 01, 2006
Waiting at health care centre, sheena my friend is too furious, criticizing me for my careless attitude. I was at my nerve, Babez It was not my intention, but it just happened, I accept my ignorance. I felt my patience has been tested enough, & I have given enough clarification. I just pretend to sleep, she tried to turn some magazine.
I slipped into last days incident. We were on a project assignment. We had ample of time, the presentation was next day. So we decided to stroll. It was quite an evening. I was mesmerized with the beaches, beautiful couple, and handsome dudes. I dint realized when I was separated from my gang?
The sun set was so peaceful, I am in other world, when I looked at my watch, the horror bell alarmed. I tried calling to my friends, the cell phone courtesy, network not reachable. fcuk, what the hell now? Indeed it was not advisable to hire private cab in alien city. Thought checking in some Motel, lemmi kill the Night. But it was fruitless effort. No bed was available. On request I got some place to put up that Night. Already many people were resting. All the sitting arrangement was fully occupied.
Now sheena was waking me again, go fast, meet the doc, our presentation has to begin within hour. I coolly walked, as I was too guilty. He prescribed some quick medicine to get relief. I thanked him, made a quick exit for our presentation.
Presentation went off well as planned. Now I threw myself on my bed again slipping into last night incident. As I said all the sitting places were occupied, I had to stand whole night. This was my one Night Stand.
ha ha naughty people what were you thinking? I had to visit Health care coz I had a soar throat standing all night in cold.
This was a April fool post. ha ha ha. Lemmi fly off before some one else fool me. lol
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
In mumbai I would prefer crowded train than a AC Car, in order to get rid of Traffic. It is not only the time saver, one can get a free unusual entertainment too. Everyday I tend to spend 2 hrs travelling in train.
To get into train during peak hours one should be an expert gymnast. Some day back I was gluing at the coming train. Before the train come to halt, people started throwing their self inside the train. Any seasoned peak hour traveler knows how it is to grab the seat so I never make an attempt to get a seat myself. I feel comfortable standing.
To my surprise there was a whole section empty. I thanked my stars & move to the vacant window seat. My enthu melted within a second when a woman stopped me in between. As I turned to her, she screwed up her face & pointed at the seat. Some pathetic creature had emptied the content of their bowels on the seat. Yuck Yuck.
I cursed for my dumb attitude, ignorance, foolishness that how could I atleast dream of getting a window seat while other souls are hanging theirselves. I haven't learnt yet the logic of living hehehe.
I stood at the other corner, cursing myself. But within moment it turned out to be an entertaining business. I kept watching the drama.
At every station, people jumped to catch that seat. Every eye want to reach there fast. The lady who saved me had a full time job of rescuing people from that Shit. People took their kerchiefs pressing their nose sandwiching their body against each other.
Some people gave advice to meet Railway staff to clean the stuff, some came up with pulling chain. Others dint seemed bothered, as long as train reach the destination at time.
Moral of the story :- crowded train + vacant space = sure Shit Shit
Saturday, March 25, 2006
Yeh ladka hai allah kaisa hai deewana
Kitna mushkil hai tauba isko samjhaana
I think opening lines obviously say's the complexity of a man lol.
My friend mintooo is a good friend of mine & we gel well with all our pranks & PJ's. Yesterday he buzzed me
he :-I am bored with life
me:- what happened? Tina has gone to her mom's place kya?
he:- No she is very much here
He:- She is the cause for my boredom
Me:- Wicked grinning Icon?
he:- perfect definition of our relationship is like a coin. Wait i will send u the pic.
Me:- Is it 25 paise or 1 rupee coin?
He:- I am serious. I S##$#d my life.Hey bhagwaan main bachelor kitna kush tha(I was so happy as a bachelor)
hey Life is so boring. search a gal for me please. What a friend u are? cant you find a gal for me? If u don’t find a gal for me I will line marofy you only. Hey bhagwaan mera number kabh aayega?( When will my number come?)
Friday, March 24, 2006
Zubeida was my Shonu's colleague. Sometimes whenever he is not in his seat she used to recieve my call, take the message for him. More often Shonu was always in meetings, so I chatted with her more. She knew that Shonu & myself are seeing each other.
She was percieving her engineering degree at evening college & working in his office on probationary basis. She was very ambitious gal. She used to seek Shonu's guidance for her career. Shonu changed the job. He changes job like Indian weather. So she requested to forward her resume, which he did.
Later we did not hear from her for 10 days. One day shonu called his old office. He wanted Zuby to meet HR Dept for negotiation on sal package & other perk& compensation.
But he got a Shock from other end. Zubieda expired. What? How? When?. While crossing the railway track, train hit her & Zuby was no more. Still her memories are with us.
Note:- Dear friends Please dont cross the Railway Tracks. Always use Foot Over Bridge. Your Life may not be precious for you. It is dearer to your loved one's.
Thursday, March 23, 2006
Keshi this I am posting in response to your post Looking for Janice.... I din't want my comment to get lost in midst.
Currently I am in Mumbai. If you provide me a little data as her(Janice's) real name & the area she used to live as Andheri or thana etc.etc I will try my best to contact the nursing home in that locality to find out the details.
Try & recollect if she had ever told you about her gynecologist name.
Dont worry in mumbai there is a best medical facility.May be she is happy changing the Nappy. With all my heart I wish this for unknown soul.
When ever I am unable reach my loved one's I wish why dont I have a remote to get signal that they are safe.
Gal, ur post made me cry :(
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
DEAR DIARY . DAY ONE
I am all packed and ready to get on the cruise ship. I've packed all my pretty dresses and make-up. I'm really excited. ______________________________________________________
DEAR DIARY . DAY TWO
We spent the entire day at sea. It was beautiful and we saw some whales and dolphins. What a wonderful vacation this has started to be. I met the Captain today and he seems like a very nice man.
DEAR DIARY . DAY THREE
I spent some time in the pool today. I also did some shuffle boarding and hit some golf balls off the deck. The Captain invited me to join him at his table for dinner. I felt honored and we had a wonderful time. He is a very attractive and attentive gentleman. ______________________________________________________
DEAR DIARY . DAY FOUR
Went to the ship's casino . did OK ... won about $80. The Captain invited me to have dinner with him in his state room. We had a luxurious meal complete with caviar and champagne. He asked me to stay the night but I declined. I told him there was no way I could be unfaithful to my husband. ______________________________________________________
DEAR DIARY .. DAY FIVE
Went back to the pool today and got a little sunburned. I decided to go to the piano bar and spend the rest of the day inside. The Captain saw me and bought me a couple of drinks. He really is a charming gentleman He again asked me to visit him for the night and again I declined. He told me that if I didn't let him have his way with me he would sink the ship. I was appalled. ______________________________________________________
DEAR DIARY . DAY SIX
I saved 1600 lives today... Twice.
Monday, March 20, 2006
1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of crap.
2. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a hoot.
3. How about "never?" Is "never" good for you?
4. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.
5. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
6. Ahhh, I see the mess-up fairy has visited us again.
7. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
8. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
9. Are you coming on to me or having a seizure?
10. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
Note:-- he he he ha ha ha To my colleagues if in case you come across here , this is what the internal processing is taking place behind my sweet smile. Dont dare to bug me lol
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Every one feels "He is the one". Every one says Love is blind. Is really love blind. No!! Love is not blind but it is a deal.
My friends say they are madly in love with some guy. How is that guy? A person who drive a smart Car, with decent bank balance, with good qualification, Good Job with many other feature.
Then I said my friend "you don't like a main system, you just love the accessory". Even I may not be exception here.
So I question myself. Is there exist real love? No Love. Everything is requirement. If Love exist then why don't we fall in love with some one who is less blessed than us. Why this filter?
Other day I was discussing with my cousin on the subject of women & equality in job opportunity. My cousin said "Men should be given preferences.If Men get a job one family survives, If female no much help. Look men are ready to marry unemployed female. Are female willing to marry unemployed men. They look for more qualified person". Yes, I agree here we female are not so broad minded.
Female blog readers don't beat me up. It is a fact. Apple is an Apple. I have guts to accept.
Tuesday, March 14, 2006
picthkari uda hain
ghata mann jhum utha
rang chalke hain neele hare laal
Have a Safe & Colourful Holi !!!! ;-))
Tip:- Apply heavy coat of coconut oil to your hair & a Coat of Vasaline or baby oil to ur body to get away with colors easily
Saturday, March 11, 2006
From my diary
Another Long day, Same release funda, one more night out. Now a days it has been a routine. came home fully tired, Was 3 A.M, eyes were fighting to keep open.Legs were refusing to walk.
Thought shall drink some juice before crashing, as in london during night outs, only available stuff is pizza. Went into kitchen opened a fridge to take a juice, could see a light in opposite house. A handsome guy in that kitchen.
Now what? Should I miss this chance? My inner mind said na, My eyes were wide open, My legs were in a mood to dance . Now what to do? I said yeah! Lots of utensil in sink waiting to get cleaned. Yes I was more happinier then Archimedis. I said Eureka. Started cleaning utensils all bright & glittering. Handsome guy too started cleaning his utensils. Exchanging a glimpse, smile both continued. He was still in kitchen with his black cat. I said now tomorrow is another day.
Shall catch some sleep now. Just Waved at that handsome, said good night, Slipped into sleep. If behind every sucessful man , if there a women , Behind every glittering utensil of mine, there is a handsome nieghbour... What a inspiration?
Thursday, March 09, 2006
Shortly My blog will be rechristened from "Bold and Beautiful" to "My Wild Thoughts" .
As per numerologist Beediwala this change will bring luck to me & my blogs.Without even any creative or constructive thoughts my blog will attract more readers & also I should not get surprised to win Blogroti, blogrice, blogcurry,blogdal etc etc awards.
In fact adding "k" letter "kMy Wild Thoughts" will do the wonders.
Conversation between Beediwala & myself goes something like this.
BNB:- Good day sir.As Iam so frustrated with my blog. It is not so happening, how can I help my blog?
Beediwala:- Good day, U have to change ur blog name.Suggest 10 names I will see as per numerology what works good.
BNB:-Sir "My Wild Thoughts"
Beediwala :- add k make it "kMy Wild Thoughts"
BNB:- oh god I am not interested in keema of my blog
Beediwala:- oh dear,u make "k" silient.The advantage is u are blogging in english. English is such a funny language u can alter according to ur requirement. Spell something & pronounce something.
BNB :-How much luck k will bring?
Beediwala:- U will be awarded blogkabab, blogtandori,blogmakanwala. Without K u will have to get satisfied with Blogroti, blogrice, blogcurry,blogdal etc etc awards.
BNB:- I am very health conscious person.blogkabab, blogtandori,blogmakanwala will make my blog fat & ugly. Then I have to put my blog again to diet. Instead I am happy with Blogroti, blogrice, blogcurry,blogdal. So I prefer just "My Wild Thoughts". Thank you.
Beediwala:- Thank you & good luck
Now I am busy writing vote of thanks for award function. Once I am through I will rechristen my blog. lol
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Pretty women wonder where my secret lies
I'm not cute or built to suit a model's fashion size
But when I start to tell them
They think I'm telling lies.
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips
The stride of my steps
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please
And to a man
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees
Then they swarm around me
A hive of honey bees.
It's the fire in my eyes
And the flash of my teeth
The swing of my waist
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me
They try so much
But they can't touch My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
It's in the arch of my back
The sun of my smile
The ride of my breasts
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman
Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
It's in the click of my heels
The bend of my hair
The palm of my hand
The need for my care.
'Cause I'm a woman
If there happens any rebirth what would u like to be Born as?A Man or A Woman?& Why?
Friday, March 03, 2006
Shuttling between (Home) India & (in-laws place) Client's place in London has taken lots from me. To keep my blog life alive I was just posting some forwards. Now I am at home hahaha(Indian office) & full pledge blogging.
I havent knew that It would mean a lot to me. What I started as virtual timepass would attach me really.I never thought that I would connect them so well, learn couple of lessons.There are many Friends withoutout faces but I know them well with thier id's. I have my own image of them.
Blogging I did it for a mere timepass. But it has helped me understand fellow bieng better.
Though I never leave much of a mark in every blog I read, I read quite a lot. To my surprise I found so many beautiful(internal) people with beautiful thought. I found how each one are so special. Each one has thier own FEELINGS.
Learnt some lesson, laughed like mad, some made me cry, became stuborn with some thoughts, some melted my heart.
Many were heart broken, some tried to cope with it, some were sinking into it.
When I analysed my own blog, I could not stop noticing, I have learnt to respond others either by visiting to the blogger's space who has visited me or by replying to thier comments. Before this blog happened to me in my life, I never took pain to reply either to letters or mails. I never felt each one has a feelings, each one are important.
Small things make real big difference in life.
Thought for the day :- Keep your office clean .. stay home!!!
Thursday, February 23, 2006
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
A woman who is a perfect "10"
A woman who can cook like his mother.
A woman who keeps a clean house.
A woman who does not nag.
A woman who can stretch a dollar.
A woman who can work all day
and dance all night.
A woman who will love only him.